Boxing Day Madness

Boxing Day and grandma’s back in London en route to India

I woke to hear Radio 4 news about shoppers queuing all night outside department stores to buy ‘Bargains’ . They are mad I thought. Around lunchtime I found myself drawn inexorably towards Oxford Street. Ostensibly I told myself it was to find a book at Waterstones that I need before I leaving the next day. Actually, if I’m honest, it was the voyeuristic side of me that wanted to see if the story was true. I can’t believe people drive down motorways and queue all night to fight their way into shops to buy yet more things. How many televisions and pairs of shoes do you need?

My first impression was that this was a rehearsal for India; hordes of people jostling on the crowded pavements, bright yellow carrier bags wielded like weapons, individuals fighting their way into the stores, and yes, cycle rickshaws laden with victorious shoppers ? This could have been downtown Mumbai the only difference was the weather was as miserable and cold as the faces of the not very happy shoppers.

I found my book easily and then, as if by magic, I was mysteriously teleported into a shoe shop and came back to consciousness as I was trying on a pair of fur lined boots. I purred with delight. The queue was long and I decided to defer payment till it cleared. Magically I was teleported to another store where I found myself lovingly stroking an, oh so warm and cosy bright pink cashmere ‘Onesy’.

At this point sense fortunately kicked in and I realised that neither boots nor the Onesey were needed for a hot Indian climate. It was time to go home without ‘Bargains’ and a healthy credit card, close the case and prepare for take off in the morning

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